Sitting here. thinkin bout. how I'm gon-na do without. You around. in my life. and how am I. I gon' get by. I ain't got no days. Just lonely nights. You want the truth...Well girl im not alright. Feel out of place. and out of time. I think im gonna lose my mind...
As I stand here, at this xroads, I contemplate my next decision, with a heavy heart.
I don't know how I got here... or why. But, I do know that I want out.
The sign in front of me reads "stick it out" (left) "fuck it and move on" (right)
Trust me, Im very inclined to move it to the right... but what does that say about me?
It says that I'm not a good friend and I can't stick it out through the rough times (Ride or Die card revoked). It says all the previous experiences meant nothing... I was just a surrogate for a real friend who came to fruition because you prayed hard enough for someone who "gets it."
Ultimately, I'm a piece of shit...
On the flip side... if I stay, I endure more heartache, neglect, pain and lonliness. Its ok to get shitted on but, my retaliation is just "too much." I can't get upset, I can't bitch and moan, I can't express any emotion whatsoever... because its not about me.
As I sit here... constantly playing this Babyface song in my head....
He sings: I'm dying here. its clear to see. There ain't no you, God knows there ain't no me.
There's pain if I stay... but even more pain if I leave. I've made my decision.... I will die for you today
