#fail

So on the radio today, they were discussing this article they read in Newsweek. It was talkin about how 42% of black women aren't married compared to 21% of white women. They ventured on to say that maybe black women need to lower their standards and opened up the line for calls to hear other ppl's take on the issue.
Well I'm here to say, that's a crock of shit. Granted, if you have standards that are just doin the most... then maybe you should make them more reasonable. But, for the most part, I don't think a black woman should have to change her standards.
My parents told me, especially my mother, to never settle for less. If I'm used to a certain standard of living, why would I downgrade myself? Is it wrong for me to want good things for myself?
Then they brought up the tired ass excuse of you shouldn't immediately discount a person based on their credit score, job or education... and it's true, you shouldn't. But, I feel it's an indicator of some character traits that you might want to stay mindful of. It's the equivalent of meeting a man who has like 6 kids and 4 baby mommas. You can't immediately judge him and think that he's a bad person, but that level of irresponsiblity will always be in the back of your mind and may keep you from fully trusting him.
I think the part that really upsets me about the whole situation, is the fact that the onus falls on the black woman (like we don't already worry about enough shit). Why do WE have to lower OUR standards. Why can't men UP their STATUS? Essentially what they are sayin is that black men can continue to live this substandard livestyle and not change, while we have to subject ourselves to bullshit. It's not fair and I hate that...
I understand that black men have it the hardest, but that doesn't mean that they can't fight it. And on some real, most black women I know, their standards aren't even all that high. An educated black woman already knows that the chances of her finding a black man on her level is pretty slim to none... so from jump her standards are already lowered. How far down you expect her to go?
When I sit back and just look at this whole situation... all I can do is shake my head and laugh. It's so unbelieveable how sad it is. And I think the saddest part is that this situation is not going to get any better, it's probably going to get worse. We (black people) continue to reinforce black men's bullshit by justifying deficient behavior by saying "Oh, well you shouldn't judge him because he doesn't have a high school diploma or his credit is bad but, he's still a good person." That's #wack
Don't fall for that... it's a trap. Clearly, there's other problems that need to be worked out, but that's another blog.